This section will contain informative articles, reports, information or how-to guides on various subjects as it takes my fancy.
This section is for any special articles or guides on cooking, food preparation, and food enjoyment.
As many people may know, Coyote is always hungry. And since I have thumbs and a forebrain in this body, I like to take advantage of it in order to enjoy delicious food. I love cooking, and I love eating. Hence, this section.
You should also check out the recipes index, for individual cooking recipes, and please feel free to contribute your own as well!
Many Americans today get all their meals in little boxes that you throw into the oven or microwave, or that you buy from restaurants and fast-food joints. They don't know how to cook, or they don't feel they can cook well, or they don't think they have the time to cook, much less learn how to cook. That makes Coyote sad. People work all day to survive in this society, then they spend extra hours on top of working their day jobs running around paying bills, running errands, washing clothes, and shopping for food and other necessities.
When you think about it, the main work of our hunter-gatherer and other earlier ancestors was usually the work of directly providing their own food, shelter and needs. Nowadays, we work all day at a job, so we can earn money, so that we can afford to run around doing the work of providing for our needs. How crazy is that?
So naturally, the inclination is to use some of that money to let other people do some of our work. One way that happens is that many of us buy prepared foods so that we don't have to cook ourselves. Or we buy already prepared ingredients, even when we do cook at home, so that we'll spend less time and energy cooking, or learning how to cook.
We eat "just-add-water" meals, dump stuff out of cans directly into a microwave oven-safe dish, and even cut pieces of already-seasoned and marinated meat out of plastic heat sealed containers and drop it into baking pans and just set the timer.
I suspect that a lot of people in my country don't even know what food tastes like when prepared with fresh vegetables, spices, and other ingredients. And that makes Coyote sad also.
Don't get me wrong - food preservation has not only made civilization able to sustain much larger numbers of people safely, and has given us protection from famine and a way to make use of surplus, but it's also made it easier to prepare a lot of meals quickly. That can be especially important in a modern age where so much of our time is taken up with work and meta-work related activities that we just don't have time or energy to fiddle around in the kitchen for an extra hour.
Hmm... wow... now that I'm thinking about it, those arguments almost sound like arguments against food preservation! Ha ha!
But basically, what I want to get across here is that for many foods and flavorings, the difference in flavor and ultimate enjoyment of completed dishes can be phenomenal. Having said that, there are benefits to using preserved and packaged foods, that "cooking snobs" should not ignore. Indeed, in some cases, the method of preserving the food imparts a flavor or texture that makes that kind of prepared food the only way to go in order to get a certain result with cooking.
Also... I believe that the further you separate yourself from where food comes from &em; from where the forces that allow you to remain a living creature come from &em;, the more separated you become from the processes of life, and how to experience it, and how to even understand and enjoy your own body and senses.
I urge people to learn how to cook for themselves even if it's just in a rudimentary fashion, and even if they don't do it all the time. You'll learn to appreciate certain things more, and you'll probably enjoy how your meals taste a whole lot more. But even if you don't cook for yourself, find someone who not only can cook for you, but who will make good food.
It is my intention to include in this compilation, not just recipes for individual food items and dishes, but informational articles on the food and ingredients themselves.
And for those who worry that this whole cooking with good ingredients thing is difficult or complicated... please keep in mind... I'm Coyote. I'm lazy. I'd only put forth the effort if it's worth it, and I always aim to put forth as little effort as possible to get a job done right. If I can do it, so can you.
This small article assumes that you are actually cooking for yourself, and preparing a meal more or less from scratch.
Keep in mind though, that even if you are making some pre-prepared or processed food, that the addition of your own flavorings can turn even that boxed, powdered, dried mashed-potato-flake stuff into greedy, mouth-watering goodness. Yes, some things are better when made completely from scratch, but we all know that often we're not going to make certain things from scratch. Adding some fresh ingredients, or even just adding a few dried spices, can improve the flavor of a meal.
A lot of people are only familiar, at best, with dried herbs and spices, or with vegetables that come frozen or from a can. They think potatoes come in a box, that basil and garlic come in little jars of powder or flakes, and that onions come only on fast-food burgers or in packets of soup mix. Carrots and broccoli and other vegetables that don't come in a can filled with strange-smelling liquid come in little frozen bags and boxes.
But remember, those things came from the earth before they went into those packages. Those methods of preserving food are great, and allow us to keep things readily on hand, especially when we can't find fresh, or don't have a lot of time.
But something is always lost or changed when food is dried, frozen, canned, or locked in a dark place with only corn syrup solids to keep it company.
I'll give some examples of foods or ingredients that can taste much different, often phenomenally better, when fresh. Perhaps someday, I'll expand this topic, but for now, I'll just mention a few items to get people started.
The next time a recipe calls for basil, garlic powder, or cilantro, you might want to try getting some of the fresh herb instead of reaching for that jar of dried bits and flakes. I'll make some notes about several staples.
Don't get me wrong... I always try to keep certain dried ingredients on hand in my kitchen. They save time, I don't always have the fresh ingredient on hand, and sometimes, even when I do have fresh, the dried version imparts a different but desirable result.
There's also several dried or otherwise preserved herbs, spices, and flavorings that I consider a staple in my kitchen.
I always keep some form of garlic on hand, even multiple forms of it. I use it in cooking a lot. It's healthy, and imparts delicious and savory flavor to all sorts of foods.
Fresh Garlic
Whenever possible, and when you have the time and energy, fresh cloves of garlic are nearly always preferable to anything else.
Fresh garlic comes in little bunches, called bulbs, surrounded by a thin, papery skin. Each bulb contains several individual cloves, and this is often the unit of measurement called for in cooking... cloves (not to be confused with the spice called clove).
To peel a clove of fresh garlic easily, first seperate it from the rest of the bulb. With the fingers of both hands, grab the clove by the top and bottom, and gently bend and twist the clove - this will cause the skin to peel and crack open a little, and often, you can remove it in one piece.
Some people recommend putting the cloves onto a hard surface and smashing them with something (the bottom of a glass ketchup bottle works), causing the skin to split and peel apart. I don't like that method because it is messier and often you get little flakes of skin stick in the remains of the smashed clove.
If you are going to use fresh garlic, I advise getting a small garlic press (also called a garlic crusher). They only cost a couple of dollars for a decent hand held one, and they not only reduce preparing garlic to a simple task, they actually do so in the way said to bring about the most health benefits. They crush the garlic to a fragrant paste. Some people will put the individual cloves in their garlic press or garlic crusher with the papery skin still on. This saves time, but I prefer to peel it first. Generally, all you do is pop in the clove, squeeze the handle, and smashed garlic is forced out little holes in the bottom of the press with a crunch, and the tougher, fibrous parts of the garlic are left behind in the press.
Some people prefer, and some recipes call for, sliced garlic. To make this, peel the cloves, put them on a cutting board, and then with a very sharp knife, gently slice the garlic as thinly as you can. The way I usually do this is to hold the clove down with the thumb and forefinger of one hand, and laying the flat of the knife blade against the forefinger, I use my finger as a guide to make paper-thin slices. Some people are fussy enough to actually use a razor blade for this, to get slices that are thin enough to see through. I'm usually not that obsessive.
Minced Garlic in a Jar
In most grocery stores, you can purchase jars of garlic that have either been minced into teeny-tiny cubes, or crushed into paste, and preserved in oil or water. This is a real labor-saver, and I always try to keep a large jar of this on hand. It's not quite one hundred percent as good as fresh garlic, but it's so close that most of the time I consider it well worth the time and effort saved, and in many dishes, it is indistinguishable from fresh.
Garlic Powder
The first rule of buying garlic powder, for me, is to buy garlic powder, not garlic salt. Garlic salt is salt flavored with garlic, and often, to get the proper amount of garlic flavoring for a meal, you'd end up adding enough salt to give an elephant hypertension. I always add garlic and salt separately.
Now, garlic powder simply does not have the same richness, intensity, and flavor of fresh. Some of the components of flavor are completely missing or changed. For one thing, fresh or jar-preserved garlic impart a sweet flavor to food when cooked, and garlic powder does not.
However, not only is garlic powder convenient to use for quickie dishes, there are some times when it is actually preferable. There are a few dishes where I add garlic powder instead of, or even in addition to, fresh garlic (I love to sprinkle garlic powder on roasts, steaks, and potatoes).
There is simply little contest between fresh basil and dried. Fresh almost always wins hands-down for me. It is fragrant, sweet, and the effect that fresh basil has on a meal, especially in Italian dishes, is incomparable. In Thai, Vietnamese, and other Asian foods where basil is an ingredient, don't even bother to prepare dishes that call for basil, unless you have fresh. Dried simply will not work. Basil is part of the mint family, along with oregano and bergamot (orange mint).
The most common form of basil used in this country is sweet basil. When you just see the word basil applied to the herb, you can be 99.9% sure that it is sweet basil (also called basilico). This is the basil that is a staple in Italian cooking. For Asian cooking, you can substitute sweet basil, but it is better to obtain Thai basil if you can find it. The flavor is slightly different, and it is better in soups.
Some recipes call for entire basil leaves, either added uncooked, after the food is prepared, or cooked into the food. For sauces, it is usually better to mince the basil leaves.
To mince a basil leaf, pluck the leaf or leaves from the stem, removing as much stem as possible. Roll the leaf up tightly, and with a sharp knife, chop it into fine bits, holding it in the rolled-up state as you do so. This is the easiest way to mince many fresh herbs, such as cilantro or mint.
Some recipes call for a whole "bruised" leaf. To bruise a leaf or leaves, roll them up, as before, then twist them gently like you are wringing out a tiny rag, and crush it between your fingers without breaking the leaves into pieces. When you are done, most of the leaf should have turned a darker green, and be much limper. An invigorating aroma should also pour forth.
While I'm on the subject of basil, much of what I've said about it also applies to oregano. When a recipe calls for oregano, try using fresh instead of dried - you won't be sorry.
The next time you are making pasta sauce from a jar, while heating it up on the stove, add a few leaves of fresh, bruised basil (and oregano if you like, although it's not my favorite herb), while it is heating up. You won't be sorry. You can also add minced or bruised leaves to the dish after it has been cooked, and you won't believe how good it tastes!
As far as I'm concerned, don't even bother with using dried cilantro. It tastes nothing like fresh at all. When preparing foods, especially Mexican foods, a little fresh, minced, bruised cilantro adds wonderful, cool, refreshing flavor and perks up the whole meal.
Be careful with cilantro though. Use it sparingly, or it will overpower a food and make it taste a lot like dish soap!
Fresh green onion adds a lot of savory flavor to various dishes. I always try to keep some on hand.
Green onions, also called scallions, are long shoots, about the width of a large pencil, white near the roots, shifting to emerald green at the top. They are normally sold inexpensively in large bunches. They can be added as an extra accent to many recipes, especially those that call for other sorts of onions (I add them in addition to, not usually as a substitute for sweet onions.) They are also good in soups, and as a garnish on top of chicken dishes, or on baked potatoes.
When preparing green onions, cut off the roots at the end and discard them. Normally, they will be cut cross-wise in little rings or tubes. The green part of the shoot also adds attractive color to foods. I normally do not cut very far up onto the green part of the scallion, unless I specifically want the color, or to add them to potatoes, and in any case, when using green onions, the closer you get to the top, the tougher and more fibrous the plant gets. Stop before you get to the part that is tough and papery.
Where possible, in dishes that call for hot spice or chili, I much prefer to use fresh chili peppers. The powdered forms of cayenne and red pepper are nice, but I like to add fresh hot peppers when possible. Not everyone likes spicy foods, but I've found that I enjoy them, and feel healthier and happier when I make them part of my diet. They can cause the body to release endorphins, which gives you a physically happy feeling, and they can make you sweat, possibly allowing your body to shed toxins. My rule of thumb for chilies is to eat them as hot as you like them, no more, and to err on the side of flavor. To me, spicy foods should be enjoyed for their flavor, not to prove something.
Most of these peppers I mince finely, seeds and all, to add to recipes.
Habaneros
These peppers are hot and spicy, while still remaining flavorful.
Scotch Bonnets
Relatives of the Habanero, these chilis are much hotter, but still delicious.
Tabasco Peppers
These are small, sweet peppers that still pack some kick.
Thai Peppers
These are shaped like elongated teardrops, and may be either green or red. These are the ones I use most often in cooking.
One of my favorite dried ingredients, I like to keep this on hand to put on meat, veggies, and poultry. I use small amounts to perk up asparagus or other vegetables, and it is delicious added to salads (and is fantastic on fresh avocado). When cooking meats, I'll add enough of it to make the steak, chop, or chicken breast crusty.
If possible, try to get the unsalted lemon pepper - you can use more of it without salting your food to death. But don't be afraid to use regular (salted) lemon pepper if you have to.
A lot of people think they don't like onions, or don't know that onion adds such wonderful flavor to other foods. This is probably because most of the time, they've been exposed to raw, chopped onions in salads... onions are quite different when cooked. Nearly everyone who has ever told me they "hate" onions and don't eat them has raved about how good the food I make is... and I use onions in nearly everything. And lots of them!
Fresh Sweet Onion
I prefer to cook with fresh sweet onion whenever possible. Many dishes, for me, begin with sauteeing or caramlizine sliced, minced, or chopped fresh onions. I add them to spaghetti sauces, soups, gravy, and meat dishes. When you cook many meats with fresh onion, the meat comes out more tender as well as savory.
Sweet onions are generally yellowish in color. The most commonly sold ones in America are the yellow or brown "spanish," onions, or the more costly Vidalia-type onions, which are also sweeter and tastier. Don't be fooled though... while Vidalia onions are indeed delicious, basically the same variety of onion, with indistinguishable flavor is usually available cheaper all year-round - they're just not called Vidalias. Trust the sweet onions.
Leeks
A lot of people see leeks in the store and never think to use them, or know what to do. Leeks are a relative of the onion, and not only are there specific recipes for cooking them, they can also be used in recipes that call for sweet onions &em; they impart a somewhat different flavor, mild but rich. In taste, they are similar to a mild but starchy onion. Try experimenting with using leeks instead of regular onions in dishes involving cooked onion.
Onion Powder
I like to keep onion powder on hand for those occasions when I want to impart a richer, more savory flavor to foods, but where I don't have onions on hand or where I don't want big pieces of onion. Onion powder is especially good as part of an "herb and spice crust" added to meats and poultry - the dried powder sticks to the cooking meat nicely. I'll also sprinkle it (along with garlic powder) on oven-roasted (not baked) potatoes, or potatoes and carrots I'm cooking along with a pot roast.
Dried minced onions
Once in a while, I'll use dried minced onions to add a little savory flavor to soups or sauces, when I'm pressed for time, or am out of fresh onions. It's not the same, but it still adds tasty goodness to dishes that would otherwise be bland. Normally, you'll want to use these in dishes where the juice or liquid in the cooking dish can rehydrate them. Using them as a garnish is a little like eating onion-flavored fingernail clippings. They need to rehydrate when they cook.
I always like to have fresh bell peppers on hand. Properly cooked, they add a sweet vegetable flavor to other foods. Don't use frozen. Frozen bell peppers have a nasty habit of tasting like grass clippings, except for a couple of lucky brands.
I like to cut the peppers up into medium-sized strips and sautee them just a little to add into italian sauces, stir fry, and other dishes. I usually use them in conjunction with sweet onions, cooked together with them, especially in Italian or Mexican food. One of my favorite things to do is slice them into rings and use them as a topping on lasagna - they roast nicely and caramelize a bit when the lasagna is baked.
Green Bell peppers are easiest to find, and are usually a lot less expensive. Red, yellow, or orange bell peppers are prettier, and can be used to add color to food, and may be a little sweeter in flavor, but they're also a lot more expensive - often three to four times as costly as green bell peppers.
There are a handful of flavorings that I always keep on hand in my kitchen. They're prepared products that I find nearly indispensable.
In many entrees, especially when cooking soups, meat, fish, or poultry, I prefer to add a salty flavoring by using soy sauce, instead of salt. Soy sauce adds more of a savory flavor than salt.
Balsamic vinegar can be used to add tartness to certain dishes. I find it to be especially good when sauteeing vegetables, such as fresh asparagus or zucchini, and when frying tomatoes. It also adds some nice flavor to many poultry dishes.
It's also very tasty when mixed with a little bit of virgin olive oil, and used to dunk fresh bread or garlic bread.
Balsamic vinegar &em; It's not just for salad!
Normally, I don't bother to mention brand names, but this brand is indispensable to me. Huy Fong foods makes Sriracha sauce, a bright red spicy chili sauce, that can be added to many dishes and soups. I even use it on hot dogs or hamburgers. They also make a garlic chili sauce that is delicious. My friends and I often refer to these sauces as "Cock Sauce," because of the logo, which depicts a rooster.
Yep. I keep salt on hand. Some people think that just because a low-salt diet is supposedly healthier, that this means they should have a no-salt diet. You need a little salt, and salt improves the flavor of many foods. Mashed potatoes, french fries, many soups... these things would be bland in the extreme without salt to wake them up.
Already ground black pepper is fine, but if possible, getting peppercorns that you grind yourself gives a superior flavor. Black pepper can be used to add a very mild spiciness to many foods, but for me, it's main benefit comes in how it wakes up the flavor of other ingredients. It especially "wakes up," other peppers, whether chilis, red pepper powder, or green peppers.
I use this to add a medium-low burn to certain dishes, and to perk up the flavor of foods. To a die-hard pepper fan like me, it's hardly hot at all, but for the average American, it's plenty spicy. I almost always combine this with a small amount of black pepper to complement the flavor. I add red pepper to pretty much every red Italian sauce I make. I also add it to ramen and soups.
Some cooking oils are used to provide a medium for frying, or to add fat (or a substitute for fat that provides "mouth feel" to foods. Other oils also add a flavor of their own, or are primarily used as a flavoring.
In my opinion, olive oil is about the most indispensable cooking oil. It is also used to dip bread, on garlic bread, or as a component of dressing on salads.
Virgin Olive Oil
In my opinion, virgin or extra-virgin olive oil is the most desirable for cooking when oil is called on to have flavor. If you are making spaghetti, lasagna, or other italian food, or sauteeing, it's the best. I use it all the time. Virgin olive oils should be darker, even green in color, and it is acceptable, even desirable, for them to have a small amount of cloudy sediment on the bottom. They add a rich "fruity" flavor to foods.
Refined, or "plain" Olive Oil
Olive oil that has been refined and filtered, so that it has a very mild taste. It will be pale yellow in color, rather than dark or green. Some olive oils are so mild and neutral in flavor that they can be used instead of plain vegetable oils. I rarely bother with this kind of olive oil... if a dish calls for vegetable oil that should not have the flavor of virgin olive oil, I just use margarine or butter.
Butter
I like to use real butter, when I can afford it, for frying, or to use in place of oil or margarine in recipes. I hear people say "Oh no! Butter is all fatty and bad for you!" Bull-puckey. It's certainly better for you than the hydrogenated chemical soup that is margarine, or the suspiciously flavorless goo that is in most cooking oils (which are generally a mixture of whatever oil the company could get cheapest that month.)
For pretty much all cooking, I prefer to get unsalted, sweet butter. If a recipe needs salt, I can add it seperately.
Sesame oil can be used to fry foods, (usually, only small amounts are used) or as a flavoring, especially in Asian dishes.
Light Sesame Oil
Light sesame oil, or regular sesame oil has a milder flavor, and can be used as both a flavoring or to dry foods in. It's the general-purpose sesame oil in my kitchen.
Toasted sesame oil
Toasted sesame oil has a much more dramatic flavor. I would never fry or cook in this oil, but I add it frequently as a flavoring. It adds both a fatty mouth feel, an aromatic taste, and it increases the savory factor of foods.
Hot Chili Oil
This oil can be used to fry foods, or as a flavoring. It is generally a sesame oil in which peppers have been steeped, or pepper oil has been added. Use it sparingly, unless you are a spicy-food junkie like myself.
Yep... you heard me right. Peanut butter is great to have on hand. Most people don't believe that it can be a cooking ingredient, but it can be used to make a very rich, flavorful sauce, is useful in several Asian dishes, and can be added in very small amounts to thick soups, gravies, or stews to make them mysteriously richer &em; it also has a thickening effect. When making a large batch of fried rice or stir fry, adding a tiny dollop of peanut butter can wake up the whole meal. It doesn't go with everything, but you'd be surprised at where it comes in handy.
While there's plenty to expand on, I hope I've managed to pique some interest, and share a little of what goes in my kitchen cabinets. Comments welcome!
This section is for articles related to a hobby of mine - body painting, especially with liquid latex.
Not many people are into this, and this means that there's very few decent guides out there, and not a lot of useful information for enthusiasts, hence this section on my website.
Before you read further, this guide contains descriptions of how to apply liquid latex body paint to a whole human body. While this is often done for purely artistic purposes, there are those who will consider this sort of thing to be inherently sexual, especially when an entire naked person is involved.
This guide will include descriptions of how to paint portions of the body that are normally covered by clothing. If that's the sort of thing that will offend you, don't read any further. If you are a minor, turn back now unless you have your parents approval. This document is written with mature adult readers in mind.
I welcome any comments or suggestions especially from others who are experienced with using liquid latex body paint.
The main reason I created this guide was because I was unable to find answers to many questions I had when I decided to try liquid latexing my whole body for a costume party. There are several very vague and incomplete guides out there, that simply don't have answers for specific situations, especially for guys.
They not only didn't answer my questions, they didn't mention important things that can complicate using liquid latex or which can cause bad results.
The length of this guide may make it seem complicated to work with liquid latex, but I assure you, it isn't at all. It can be time-consuming, but it doesn't require a great deal of expertise.
It's a lot of fun, it's an easy medium to work with, and unlike other kinds of body paint, once it's on, it won't smear off of you and onto your furniture. You can get some really neat artistic effects, and it _feels_ really neat on your body. Once it's dried and sealed, you can put clothes on over it without a problem, if you need to.
Get a good supply of a decent quality liquid latex. I've heard good things about "Deviant", but I bought a cheaper brand, called Maximum Impact, and several friends tell me is higher quality and thicker than Deviant. I got mine from The Bodypaint Store:
Bodypaint Store Webpage
mailto:bodypaintstore@sbcglobal.net
(Shameless plug for these folks - they sent me a quality product, fast, at a great price.)
An important note: I originally bought a gallon of this product, and it was perfectly good. An acquaintance bought several smaller jars, and the quality was very different - presumably because the smaller jars don't store as well and the quality of the paint degrades more quickly. If you're going to do this, I advise you to bite the bullet and get a whole gallon. And no... I don't get a kickback for saying that.
This is the most important part, next to the latex itself. Trust me, you _cannot_ cover your entire body with liquid latex by yourself. There's actually very little that you can easily do on your own. You will need help. The more helpers you can get (barring having so many they get in each other's way), the faster and easier it will go.
This spray contains silicone, and serves two purposes: It makes the latex shiny, but it also helps to prevent it from sticking to itself. The latter is the most important part, in my book. Even after the latex is mostly dried, if it touches another piece of dried latex, it will almost instantly bond together, and you'll certainly tear it when you move or try to seperate it again.
You can use talcum powder in addition to, or instead of silicone shine spray.
For applying the latex, I used foam applicator brushes. These worked really well. Some people use paintbrushes, or sponges, or even their fingers. Remember, the latex can be _really_ hard to clean out of a brush, so you'll probably want one you don't mind disposing of afterwards. If you use the sponge brushes, get plenty of extras. They're cheap, and you will use up several.
Latex will nearly instantly soak into anything porous, like your clothes, carpet, or upholstery. Make sure you've covered anything around you with newspaper, dropcloth, or something else to protect against drips or accidents. Once it's in your carpet, it's going to stay there.
You'll probably want to pour out just enough latex to use, as you use it. If you have too little sitting there, it can dry out, and if you work just out of the jar, you might cause your latex to expire early. If you pour out too much, you may waste it, and this stuff is expensive. Use something that won't tip over, and that you can leave your brushes in while doing other things.
Each coat of latex will dry much faster if you have a fan, and/or a blowdryer with a low-heat setting. Make sure, if you use a fan, that it's not blowing over your brushes or paint dish while you work.
You'll want a work area that either cannot be harmed by spills or paint, or one that you can protect with newspaper or dropcloths. The work area should be well-ventilated. Liquid latex uses ammonia as a solvent to keep it liquid, and the fumes can be unpleasant in a poorly-ventilated area. Don't worry... once it's dry the ammonia is gone.
The latex will not stick to smooth surfaces like porcelain (most bathtubs) or smooth tile or linoleum. Any porous surface (paper, cloth, carpet, clothing, concrete, plaster, etc.) is susceptible to the wet latex paint sticking to it permanently. When in doubt, cover it up. Once the latex is dry, there is no problem.
This guide includes instructions for the entire body, but you may decide that you don't necessarily want to paint everything. Sometimes, I won't paint all of my legs, or won't paint my arms, for instance. Decide what you want to accomplish, artistically, beforehand.
Shave everything that's going to be painted. Really. I mean it. Your butt-crack too, if you are going for total coverage. If you are too shy to shave everywhere, you are too shy to be covering your body with liquid latex.
Any hair you miss, you'll find out about later, the hard way. Very short stubble isn't going to be a big deal, so you can shave the day before if you want to. For instructions and hints on shaving your body (if you're not already experienced with that), you'll probably want to consult one of the many more detailed guides on the subject.
Here is a link to a shaving guide:
http://velvetdragon.com/etc/shave.html
Before you start painting, take a good shower, and dry off completely. After you've done this, it is recommended that you apply a decent moisturizer. I used an aloe-based one. Obviously, make sure you don't use one that stays greasy, and that it's completely dry before you start painting.
Either choose a work area that won't be harmed by spills or smears, or make sure you put down newspapers, drop-cloths, or something else to protect the area.
- Obviously, follow warnings on the packaging. Make sure you do not have a latex allergy. Try some out on a small area of skin a few days before you plan to actually use it, leave it on for a while, and make sure there is no irritation. Also, liquid latex is preserved with ammonia. It smells rather strong before the ammonia evaporates.
- Apply coats evenly, and thinly. If you make each coat too thick, it will take longer for the coats to dry, and there will be more chance of mishaps. You will need to do at least three coats. Applying several thin coats will take less time than a couple of thick ones, because thin coats dry faster, and multiple layers will be stronger. It's okay if the first coat shows some streaks... by the time you put on the second or third coats this will be taken care of. Better to put on more thin coats than to ruin the whole thing by trying to slather on thick coats.
- Be sure each coat is completely dry before applying the next coat. Properly applied, Liquid latex dries fairly quickly, especially if you use a hairdryer or fan. With a blowdryer, a coat can dry in 30-60 seconds. While it does not fully cure for 24 hours, it will cure enough to do your next coat in just a few minutes. Do not rush this. Rushing will not only get you poorer results, it will take you longer.
- Make sure the room is neither too hot nor too cold, but if you have to err, err on the side of cold. If you are sweating while trying to apply the latex, you'll have a lot more problems applying it. Also, for guys, being a little chilly may help your little soldier keep from standing to attention while you are trying to paint it.
- Don't let your brushes or applicators dry out. If you do, you may scratch the surface of the latex, or get partly dried latex stuck to the brush and also to your already-applied coats of paint, and that can cause bumps, tears, and other yucky stuff. If a brush starts to get dry or gummy, stop using it and use a fresh one. Don't skimp on this part. Those little disposable foam brushes are very cheap.
- If the person doing the painting gets liquid latex on their fingers or hands, it's best to remove it right away. Remember, latex sticks to itself, so if you leave it on your fingers to dry, then accidentally touch the person you are painting, it will stick and tear. It is easy to remove latex from the fingers - merely rubbing it, even when it is wet, will make it form into little dried globs and come right off.
- Do one area at a time. The larger an area you can safely do at once, the faster it will go, but don't bite off more than you can chew.
- At the edge of each area, don't try to make a solid line as a boundary, except against areas that won't be painted at all. Try to "feather" the latex over the area next to it. That way, when you do the next area, you'll get a smooth, seamless join, instead of a crease or line. Also, if you make a "hard" line between areas, it is more likely that the edge will come loose and "roll up" a little while you are still working, and then you'll really get a line.
- I recommend doing broad, easy, open areas (legs, torso, back, arms) first, and _then_ doing areas at joints (like armpits, and the crease between thigh and groin) last. Those latter places are the most likely to stick or give you trouble. If you stay away from joints until other areas are gone, the person being painted will not have to hold still in awkward positions for long periods of time either.
- As you finish each area (that means, after you've done all three or more coats and they have dried), go over it with the finishing spray or a light coating of talcum powder. The finishing spray product recommends spraying it onto a cloth and wiping it on, but I sprayed it directly on and smoothed it with my hands. Make sure you work it in really well. The finishing spray does not prevent new (still liquid) latex from sticking to sealed latex at all. It just keeps the dried latex from adhering to itself. Same with powder.
- If you are using talcum powder, put just a small amount on your hands at a time, and gently pat it onto the surface of the latex. You don't need very much. When you are finished painting, the person painted can shower with soap and water to remove excess powder, so don't worry about it changing the appearance. It is best to use powder in conjunction with the silicon shine spray - use the powder first, then the spray.
- If you use talcum powder, the easiest and least messy way to deal with it that I have found is to put a small amount into a plastic grocery bag, pat your hands gently onto the surface, and then apply it to the subject. This reduces the amount of powder that gets everywhere.
- Don't get latex in your eyes, inside your ear canal, or into your nose, or inside other places in your body. It's not that it's poisonous or anything, but that doesn't mean it can't cause you difficulties. You'll especially be sorry if you get liquid latex in your nose hair, I'm sure.
- At any place where there is a "join" in the body, first do one side of the join, and seal it, then do the other. Remember to "feather." Examples are armpits and where the thighs meet the groin.
- If you are planning to do your head and face, remember that you have eyebrows. I've heard of people rubbing vaseline into eyebrows so that the latex will come off and they won't have to shave their eyebrows off, but I haven't tried that. I just avoided doing my face altogether. YMMV (Your Mileage May Vary).
- Keep in mind how long you plan to be covered in latex. If you are planning to be wearing it for many hours, or all day or night, make sure you go to the bathroom first. I'm guessing that discovering you have to poop while covered in latex, would be very distressing.
- Remember, people fart. It's a fact of life. You'll want to make sure there's a way for a poot to "escape" if that happens, or you will have a fart bubble trapped under your latex. Ick. My advice is, if you pass gas while covered with latex, go somewhere private and make a tiny hole where the bubble is, so it can get out. Failing that, learn to hold it.
- Any area that is stretched out on your body when you apply latex will wrinkle up when it is no longer stretched. So, if you stick your belly out, for instance, and paint it, when you relax it, you'll have wrinkles there. Keep this in mind when doing your torso, genitals, and neck.
- Any area that is creased when you paint on the latex, offers risk of tearing the latex or having the crease stick together when you unbend the area if you are not careful. Keep this in mind for elbows, shoulders, and knees.
- when getting to edges of areas that will be painted, that are not going to be painted, don't try to make straight lines and nice borders on the early coats. It is easiest to leave them a little rough, and then, after all the rest of the body has been painted, to touch up the edges with smooth, even, single passes of the brush. If you try to make it perfect on the first coat, you'll invariably screw it up on the second or third.
This section exists because I ended up having to figure out, by trial and error, some stuff that I really wish there'd already been a guide to, or a place to ask questions. I'm guessing most people either don't even think of some of this stuff, or are embarrassed to talk about it.
I am assuming that the reason I could find no information on this part of the body is that people are shy about discussing it. Fortunately, I am a neopagan, humanist, and occasional naturist/nudist and I don't think genitals are dirty or shameful, so I will gladly share some tips.
I originally elected to do my genital area first, because it is the most fiddly and complicated area to do, and there seem to be the most things that can go wrong there. As I became comfortable working with latex I decided that it's better to save this area for last.
Because of the lack of specific information on this subject, I had to waste quite a bit of time and supplies finding a method that would work (hence this guide). When you are inexperienced with latex painting, if you do this trouble spot first, then you save yourself the risk of doing your whole body and then having to start over if you mess up the smallest and most difficult part.
Basically, the main difficulty with this area is that your genitals are soft and squishy. They don't have lots of muscle and bone to give them shape, so you are painting loose skin. Also of course, unlike many other body parts, they can change size or shape while you are working - it had to be said. You probably won't have as much of an issue with this as you think, but it can happen. The second most common question I get from guys is "what happens if I get an erection?" The answer is that when you're involved with getting painted, it's generally distracting enough that it won't happen, especially if you save this part for last.
The thing I found that worked best for painting my groin was to do the back half of my scrotum first, and finish that completely. Then do the front half, and seal the area with the silicone spray or powder, before trying to paint the penis.
Regarding the penis, you'll probably want to stay flaccid as possible. If you get an erection while painting, then when it shrinks, the latex will be really, really, super-wrinkly. If that's the look you're going for, of course, then that's fine. Don't worry too much about painting a flaccid penis and getting an erection later. If you have a thick enough coat of latex, this stuff stretches a lot, and it's unlikely your John Thomas is going to be able to rip it's way out. Besides which, most guys find that after you've walked around in the buff a while it's not as "sexy" as people are led to believe.
As with every other area of the body, try to "feather" a bit at the edges so that it will join up when you do the next area.
You will want to make sure your legs are well apart, so that your bits don't get stuck to, or smear latex on, the inside of your thigh - Unless you want to spend the whole of your latex time with your gonads glued to your leg.
Guys, you'll have a decision to make with your genitalia. You can either stick your penis down onto your scrotum with the latex, so that it's all one package, or you can try to paint them separately, seal them with the silicone finishing spray, and keep them separate.
Also, keep something important in mind - you'll still need to pee. Make sure that you don't cover over the opening of your penis. I'm sure that the result of trying to urinate with a painted-over urethra is going to be disappointing or messy. Make sure to leave a tiny opening at least. You may have to sit down to pee.
My apologies, but I'm not a girl, and I haven't ever had to paint any. If someone would like to contribute something to this area of the document, I'd appreciate it, because I don't want to steer anyone wrong.
Another possible trouble area may be your butt. There's the "crack" down the middle, of course, but for those of us who aren't built like greek gods, there's also probably a crease under each cheek where latex might stick together.
The method I've found is easiest is to have the subject lean forward slightly, so that the bottom of their butt-cheeks don't touch their legs. It may help to have a chair or something that the person can lean against. They should keep their butt-muscles relaxed with their cheeks together, and the painters can just paint over the whole butt, crack and all, in one fell swoop.
(aka the "gooch")
Don't know what to say, other than to try and be careful with the area. The join of legs and crotch, front and back, is of course one of the places where large areas of the body all come together in a small area, and where you have to move a lot. Just try to get everything covered evenly and not let it get stuck together. It's actually not as hard as it seems.
This is the easiest area of the body to paint. It is best to have the person relax, but try to keep their stomach firm, and to stand straight up with the arms away from the sides. It doesn't matter whether you paint the front first, or the back, but do those first and then paint the sides. This makes it easier on the person being painted, because when you are painting their sides, they will have to hold their arms up and out of the way.
The legs are another easy part of the body to paint. Just keep them somewhat apart and straight, and go to town. Pay special attention to the backs of the knees. You may want to stay away from the groin until the last part, so that the person doesn't risk sticking to themselves when they move.
I suggest you paint the tops of the feet only, if you decide to paint the feet at all. Normally, I stop painting right above the ankle, but you can do the rest of the feet if you like. If you paint the bottoms of the feet, it's probably going to be disappointing.
The arms can be a little tricky. I recommend doing the torso and sides first (sealing with powder or silicon spray of course). Have the subject stand with their arms comfortably at their sides and, starting from the shoulders, paint the top (the side away from the body) side of the arms first, and seal with powder or spray.
Next, have the person raise their arms enough to get at them, and paint the whole inner side except for the armpits. Powder or spray to seal.
Some people don't paint the armpit area at all. If you do, wait until you've done all the rest of the arms... then have the person hold their arms over their head (I usually cross mine behind my head), and paint the armpits, then seal them.
Again, I didn't paint my head or face. If someone wants to contribute to this section, I'd welcome it.
Generally, I start with a base coat of a single color, and then add other painted designs later. Keep in mind, most colors of liquid latex are translucent, except for black, white (if you put it on heavily enough) and fluorescent blue (I think). If you try to paint over black with transparent colors, it probably won't show up very well.
I've used other kinds of paint, including hobby paint, for small designs. You can paint right on top of the latex with acrylics, although they aren't as flexible as latex. You can also stick vinyl decals directly onto latex, although you need to stick them onto unsealed or unpowdered areas. If necessary, put more fresh latex on, then apply the decal.
You can also create your own latex decals separately and stick them to the subject. That's a subject for a separate guide.
Personally, I found this part the easiest. The longer it stays on, of course, the easier it is to remove, because as you sweat, the latex loosens.
To get it started, rub with your fingers at an edge of the paint, and roll up the edge a little as it comes loose. That will give you something to grab onto and pull. You may have better luck pulling slowly and firmly to get it off in large pieces, rather than yanking or pulling quickly.
Removing the latex can feel pretty good, if it's had time to loosen first. Some people suggest taking a warm shower with soap and water while removing it, if it's proving difficult. If it's not coming off easily, try waiting a few hours, if possible. The longer you wear it, the easier it is to remove.
If you do liquid latex body-painting, sooner or later, you'll want to add designs and markings of some sort to your work. Tiger stripes, stars, superhero symbols, or whatever.
Here is a simple way to create these that will give you clean, even lines and a good appearance, and which lets you make any mistakes before you paint your own or another's body... which can save lots of work and heartache.
Liquid latex body paint is not the same as acrylic or house paint. This guide assumes you already know what this is and where to get it. If not, find out first.
You'll want a color that contrasts with the base color that is going to be on the person's body. Normally, my base color is black, so I'll use white for the decals.
Yep. That's right. Regular old wax paper.
You can use this to reinforce your decal, as well as to increase opacity. I recommend Scott's or a similar brand that is thin, smooth, and sturdy. This isn't for your butt, it's for your art.
You'll use these to cut out your decals later.
This is used to dry the latex paint in between coats.
Spread out a sheet of wax paper large enough to contain your finished design, and if necessary, tape the corners down to a work surface (one that won't be harmed by getting latex on it). I usually tape it to a scrap piece of cardboard. You will want the wax paper to be shiny side up.
Paint a layer or two of liquid latex body paint over your entire piece of wax paper. Allow it to dry completely between coats, using a hairdryer to accelerate the drying process if you have one.
Now, put an additional layer of latex paint on, but this time, before it dries, gently lay lengths of toilet tissue onto the latex in a single layer. Try to match the edges up as carefully as possible without overlap. When you've got it placed, gently press it down smoothly so that it sticks to the surface of the latex. Try to smooth it out until the color is fairly uniform, but don't rub it so hard that you wrinkle or tear it. Use the blowdryer to dry it completely. It will take slightly longer than the latex without the tissue on it.
Paint a smooth layer of latex carefully over the tissue, and let it dry, or use the blowdryer. You may add another layer or two.
Repeat with layers of latex and tissue until you have achieved the desired level of opaqueness (remember, many colors of latex are transparent by themselves).
(Optional)
If you are using a dark color, you may want to put on a layer of black latex after a few layers of colored latex and tissue. If a light color, you may want to put on a layer or two of white.
Remember, you want the last layer to be latex, not tissue paper.
You should now have a sheet of latex, reinforced several times with tissue, on a piece of wax paper.
On the non-latex side of the wax paper, you can trace your design (what you want the decal to look like). Once you have done this... use a pair of sharp scissors to cut out your decal.
You can also simply cut the latex decal into strips to make lines, into simple stars or shapes, or circles, or whatever you want.
Paint the person with the base coat of latex. That process is the subject of a different guide, though one should be available in the same place you found this guide.
Make sure that the place(s) for your decals have unsealed latex... latex that has not been sealed with shine spray or talcum powder. If necessary, apply a fresh coat of the base latex color to the area the decal must stick to.
Remember, liquid latex that is not sealed sticks to itself readily. We're counting on that to stick our decals on!
Gently apply the latex (not the wax paper) side of the decal to the desired location on your subject. Start at one end and gently roll it down over the area, being sure not to let any bubbles form. When it is in place, press it firmly down and rub the wax paper until the decal latex has adhered to the body latex.
Gently pick at the edge of the wax paper, and peel it off your decal.
Voila! You should now have a well-formed decal, with smooth, scissor-cut edges, on your body-painted subject!